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Whole People

coaching, counselling and training in Worthing (UK) and online with Pat Spink

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Whole People

coaching, counselling, training & facilitation to aid change and promote well-being.

We all love a good gossip – don’t we?

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And what’s the harm – really?

If I only tell one person, then that’s OK isn’t it…?

Or should I try and be ‘good’ and not indulge at all?

And when does talking about someone else become gossip, anyway?

One of my counselling tutors used to quote an old Yiddish proverb:

“Gossip hurts 3 people:

  • The one who gossips
  • The one talked about
  • The who listens and now has ‘guilty knowledge’ “

Continue reading “We all love a good gossip – don’t we?”

In 2018 I want to…

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Continuing one of the themes from my last blog and, particularly, some of the sentiments in ‘the Hot Chocolate Story’ at the end. I’m inviting you to take a slightly different route into planning your goals for 2018 than what you might have done before.

Instead of starting with a list what you haven’t got or achieved, how about starting the process with a list of what you have got, what you have achieved in 2017 (or earlier) and what you like or love about your life right now? Continue reading “In 2018 I want to…”

‘To Wrap or Not to Wrap?’ – that is the question…

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This morning my street is lined with wheelie bins as the first post-Christmas rubbish and recycling collection is due.

I wonder how much of the contents will be wrapping paper.

Apparently, a recent survey found that half of us in Britain would be happy to receive presents unwrapped in order to cut down on waste.

This is about saving on paper, recycling and saving the planet – and for many of us, now, this extends to doing away with physical Christmas cards, too.

Of course, it’s too late to change what we did for Christmas this year, but a good time to think about what we might want to do differently in 2018. Continue reading “‘To Wrap or Not to Wrap?’ – that is the question…”

Are You an Orchid or a Dandelion?

orchid-2265587_1920Orchids are beautiful but sensitive flowers.dandelion-16656_1920

They require protection and nurturing to blossom.

On the other hand, Dandelions can thrive virtually anywhere.

I came across this way of explaining how some of us develop differently from others when I was catching up on old episodes of Channel 4’s ‘The Secret Life of 4 Year Olds’.

It’s based on a Swedish metaphor: ‘amaskrosbarn’, a “dandelion child” and ‘orkidebarn’, an “orchid child.”  Continue reading “Are You an Orchid or a Dandelion?”

Do Something, Do Nothing or Do Something Else – for 20 Minutes

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What could 20 minutes do for you?

Depending upon how you use the time, it might:

  • help you get you going with something you’ve been putting off
  • be a welcome break during which you might also learn something new
  • or stop you doing something else that you might regret later.

Allow me to explain….

Continue reading “Do Something, Do Nothing or Do Something Else – for 20 Minutes”

Happier, calmer – and slower?

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I was prompted to think about happiness last week when a note written on the subject by Albert Einstein was sold for $1.56m.

He gave it to a courier in Tokyo in 1922 instead of a tip. Having just heard that he’d won the Nobel prize for physics he told the messenger that, if he was lucky, the note would become valuable – how right he was!

But was he also right in what he wrote in the note itself? It said:

“A calm and humble life will bring more happiness

than the pursuit of success and the constant restlessness that comes with it.” Continue reading “Happier, calmer – and slower?”

Who’s in charge, you or your emotions?

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I recently came across an article By Cody Delistraty: You’ll Be Happier If You Let Yourself Feel Bad’.

It talks about a study, led by University of Toronto Assistant Psychology Professor Brett Ford, which explores the link between our acceptance of negativity and our well-being.  Continue reading “Who’s in charge, you or your emotions?”

“I’m not in love…”

This song by 10cc and written by its band members Eric Stewart and Graham Gouldman, was played on the radio while I was driving last weekend.

Immediately it reminded me of  myself as a teenager – which I was at the time it was released. Music does that, doesn’t it, takes us straight back there.

And I realised, too, that I feel differently, as I listen to it now… Continue reading ““I’m not in love…””

Following the Herd

I was at a CIPD Sussex Branch Conference on the Future of Work yesterday which was excellent.

One of the speakers, Leatham Green (whose session I really enjoyed) showed a couple of short, very funny and thought-provoking YouTube clips about how we copy other people’s behaviour even if we don’t know why or it doesn’t make any sense. I’ve written about this phenomenon before in my post: The Psychology of Unwritten Rules’.

I thought I’d share these clips with you now because I really like them and hope that you will, too – the first is just under 4 minutes and the second just 2½ minutes – and I think both are well worth taking the time to watch for the entertainment value alone.

The first one is a social experiment:

Continue reading “Following the Herd”

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