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Whole People

coaching, counselling and training in Worthing (UK) and online with Pat Spink

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depression

Coming out of lockdown – easy or confusing?

Lockdown, though necessary to contain the initial spread of Covid-19, was hard for a lot of people. In most parts of the UK now, (and in some other parts of the world, too), restrictions are starting to ease and we’re now entering a different phase, a slightly revised ‘normal’.

Whilst these changes are extremely welcome for some – particularly those whose income has been adversely affected and who are now able to resume work – for others, this brings a new level of anxiety in terms of deciding which activities feel safe to resume, and which don’t.

In many ways, full lockdown is easier and clearer to navigate in terms of understanding what we each can and can’t do. It removes most of the element of choice and individual decision-making. Now we’re starting to have to consider different possibilities and to interpret advice and rules which are, to many of us, less clear cut. Continue reading “Coming out of lockdown – easy or confusing?”

Why I Like Watching Christmas Movies

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If you’ve read any of my previous blogs relating to Christmas (such as Christmas Presents an Issue’ or ‘Something they want … or an IOU?’) you might be somewhat surprised at the title here.

I do struggle with the commercialisation, the social/emotional pressure to be with people with whom we might not choose to spend our time, to do things (in a way) that might not sit comfortably, for everything to be ‘perfect’, the false ‘bonhomie’, and so on….

So why do I enjoy watching Christmas films?

I think I’ve finally peeled away the layers and figured it out – and what I enjoy about them actually has little to do with Christmas as such… Continue reading “Why I Like Watching Christmas Movies”

Finding our way out of the grey…

Back in June I posted this on Instagram:

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I really like what Hayley Williams said here.

Despite the substantial progress we’ve made in recent years, I think many of us still struggle with talking about mental illness – which is why we talk about ‘mental health’ instead?

And, like Williams, I think we do tend to polarise the issue – categorising ourselves and others as either completely healthy or sick – but surely there’s a whole lot of space in between these?

Continue reading “Finding our way out of the grey…”

Alone or Lonely?

alone or lonely

On one of my seafront walks recently I noticed someone sitting by themselves on the beach, gazing out to sea – much like the person in the photo here.

Given my particular interest in suicide prevention I needed to make a judgement call as to whether this person seemed in distress and, if so, whether I would approach them. In this case they seemed just fine.

But it started me thinking – they were there alone, perhaps by choice, but maybe not.

Continue reading “Alone or Lonely?”

Are You an Orchid or a Dandelion?

orchid-2265587_1920Orchids are beautiful but sensitive flowers.dandelion-16656_1920

They require protection and nurturing to blossom.

On the other hand, Dandelions can thrive virtually anywhere.

I came across this way of explaining how some of us develop differently from others when I was catching up on old episodes of Channel 4’s ‘The Secret Life of 4 Year Olds’.

It’s based on a Swedish metaphor: ‘amaskrosbarn’, a “dandelion child” and ‘orkidebarn’, an “orchid child.”  Continue reading “Are You an Orchid or a Dandelion?”

Meaningful Moments from This Year’s London Marathon

How great was it to see Matthew Rees help David Wyeth finish the London Marathon yesterday?

If you didn’t see it you can watch it here.

Some have called it the moment that defined the race. Continue reading “Meaningful Moments from This Year’s London Marathon”

How Do Men (and Boys) Grieve?

Last month’s BBC documentary ‘Rio Ferdinand: being Mum and Dad’ was very powerful, I thought. It’s currently on YouTube:

Continue reading “How Do Men (and Boys) Grieve?”

“Ma’am, you look like you’re having a bad day. Can I give you a hug?”

I was really touched by this story in the Mail Online yesterday.

It’s about a bus driver, Damone Hudson from Dayton, Ohio, who was driving over a bridge and saw a woman on the wrong side of the railings. He stopped his bus and got out to talk to her.

He stayed with her until the police arrived to take her to safety and, hopefully, to get some appropriate help. Continue reading ““Ma’am, you look like you’re having a bad day. Can I give you a hug?””

Compare and Despair

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TV and radio host Fearne Cotton talked openly this week about her own depression in a short (only 3½ minutes) BBC podcast

I was particularly struck by what she said about us “… doing that awful compare and despair sort of thing…” Continue reading “Compare and Despair”

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